thdreamstimecomp_17745581I’ve decided that there is an essential part of what makes you you that can’t be changed no matter how hard you try. Your propensity toward “morningness” or “nightness.” I know this because I’ve been trying, and failing, to change my routine.

It all centers around Frankie, of course, King of 6th Avenue and to his eyes, all of Jax Beach. Actually, in his own mind, he’s probably King of the World.

See, back when I lived alone, I could wake up when the partiers were just getting home and not hear a peep out of him — as long as it stayed dark around his crate. I kept the kitchen lights off and stayed out of the living room. Now, though I’m clear on the other side of the house and there’s a concrete wall between us, I have to creep around like a burglar well after 6:00 a.m.

The reason for this is Mom’s approach to his discipline (or lack thereof). She allowed him to bark when he woke up, getting up herself and letting him out of his crate. Now, he feels one of his responsibilities, along with alerting us to all manner of potential intruder, including lizards, is to act like her alarm clock every morning. Problem is, this alarm goes off whenever he wakes up, regardless of the hour. And he has supersonic, albeit selective, hearing. So after a couple mornings of 5:00 a.m. barking, I decided to try sleeping in (my version, in which I’m still out of bed by 7:00).

His Highness still needs to be walked however, and being that it’s summer and hot by 8:00, I decided to try to shower at night.

I’ve given up. Not only is it a complete pain to get off the couch during prime time viewing when I’m feeling vegetative and lazy, for me it’s also incredibly dangerous. My already severely compromised balance and motor control get even worse after 5 o’clock. This is not the time to be dancing around on my pole, transferring over slippery wet tile. As soon as I returned to my early bird routine, my mood improved dramatically. (So did my hygiene — I was no longer skipping showers.)

So, the moral of the story is — don’t bother fighting it. Several studies have shown that your preference is at least 50% genetic anyway. And to feel better about your type, here are some fun facts I picked up:

  • Night people tend to have higher IQ’s.
  • Morning people may be more reliable and apt to cooperate.
  • “Eveningness” is an evolutionary advancement that marks out more intelligent individuals.
  • Studies have shown that night owls may be more emotionally unstable or prone to addiction.